Our Christmas of the Snow Buddha by Cheryl
Many years ago (1981) we shared a most unusual Christmas with a family of Buddhist Cambodian refugees. It began when a woman from our church, who had just returned from serving in a refugee camp in Laos, explained that the camps were too crowded and the government was going to begin shooting the Cambodian refugees. She pleaded with members of our church, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (most of our small town) to sponsor some of the families so their lives could be saved. Though we had no idea how we were going to manage it, we volunteered. We, and two other families, simply felt prompted that it was what we should do and had faith that the Lord would help us to be able to do it.
Fall passed as we nervously expected the Cambodian family to arrive. Finally, shortly before Christmas, word came that they would be flying into Salt Lake in three days. That is when we began to realize that we were not alone. Our Stake president loaned us his large van so we would have room to transport the family of seven. He also gave us permission to use the showers at the stake center so lice wouldn’t be brought into our home.
Clean clothes were provided from the small “store” of donated clothes that was set up in a Stake members basement. Beds, blankets, and dishes were given to this family. On Christmas Eve each person was given a gift of a new coat. A doctor, dentist, and eye doctor all donated their services to give the family needed health care. Suggestions were given on possible jobs for the parents, and when they were unable to find an apartment they could afford, a generous man in our stake financed the purchase of a trailer for them to live in.
Besides being impressed with the kindness of the people in our small town of Mapleton, Utah, we also began to have new appreciation for our blessings. We had not had to flee our home. We were free to do what we wanted. Our life was so safe. Tears still fill my eyes when I remember the father showing us a picture of his first wife and telling us how the Vietnamese soldiers had killed her and their baby girl when she had refused to divulge his hiding place.
We felt new appreciation as we began to see our lives through their eyes. The Cambodians were amazed that my husband and I had a college education. Our home, which we considered very modest, was huge to them. We had two old cars. They explained to us that cars were rare in their country, and stressed that women do not drive them. Quickly, I came to appreciate that I had far more opportunities and respect than many women in the world are ever given.
I began to realize that there were so many little things I had taken for granted. When we took them to a large grocery store, the family was astounded at all the food which was available. I felt like I was presenting wonders when I showed them my washing machine and dryer. The mother was truly amazed when I opened the refrigerator and freezer. She proclaimed, “It is good! You do not have to shop every day.”
Yes, we had never before appreciated the comforts of our life as much, but as we watched this family, we also realized that they were happy with only the clothes on their backs. Being together as a family was all that really mattered. We felt more grateful than ever before for our Savior and the hope of being together forever.
As our family became lost in serving this family of Cambodians, we found greater joy in Christmas and greater peace in our family. Each of us became absorbed in helping them adjust to a strange, new place. Our children became their friends. We shared snow with them, and their enthusiasm as they tried sledding for the first time. We carefully showed them how to make a snowman, then stood back in amazement while they turned our crude efforts into a beautifully sculpted snow Buddha.
This Christmas will always be remembered for the spirit we felt in our home. It came not from fancy decorations, food, or presents. In fact, we were so busy that there was little in the way of frills. What I will never forget, though, is the people we served and the spirit of love this brought into our home that Christmas of the Snow Buddha.
oooooo
Other memories
From December 1981 to February 1982, we sponsored a Cambodian family of seven. They lived in our basement and cooked upstairs in our kitchen. They are a cabbage and rice soup each day and did not believe in sanitation. When I told the mother that it was not good to eat shrimp with red fuzz growing on it, she replied it was "good". We started eating out.
We learned that in their country, small children are carried. Our very independent two year old daughter would cry when they even moved toward her. She didn’t want to be carried! Also, in their country, you offered food to people who visited, so when we visited them in their trailer they carefully opened a new package of soda crackers and offered one to our little daughter.
I gained a lot of confidence in my abilities and I dealt with a family of seven Cambodian refugees who lived in our home for two months. Garrett had to work, so I took children to school, found them jobs, clothing, and tried to keep them happy.
One thing that made it past cultural boundaries was the Tom and Jerry cartoons. It was silent cat and mouse slapstick humor and the kids loved to watch these cartoons after school each day.
It was a challenge to have another family living in our home, especially one from a very different culture. I had made many assumptions about how they would react, but many weren’t true. The older woman did not appreciate having the black from bezel nuts cleaned from her teeth. She also didn’t want to wear the glasses she was given to help her see.
Everyone loved the coats they were given for Christmas, but we were surprised when they took them off to go outside. They were used to going barefoot and didn’t want to wear snow boots outside. I tried to explain to them about freezing and losing their fingers and toes, but they didn’t seem to understand. Finally, I had to stand in front of the door and refuse to move until they got on their coats and boots.
Sanitation was another concept that they didn’t understand. I tried to explain about using soap, but they didn’t believe in anything they couldn’t see such as germs.
Women were considered dumb and not capable of learning. They were also viewed as slaves that a man could beat and treat as he wished. Our father was raised in a Buddhist monastery and did not believe in beating and taught his daughter basic reading and math.
Because I was a sponsor, I had more status than other women did, but I still didn’t rate the respect that men did. I have had children get angry with me and even yell at me, but I’ve never been ignored and treated as if I didn’t exist. This was a new experience for me.
When they moved to Spanish Fork to live in their own trailer, they were given several 75 pound bags of rice. The 17 year old son gave his sack to the 50 year old mother for her to carry. Garrett picked the sack up and gave it back to the son. I thought the woman was going to kiss Garrett's feet!
At first the mother worked at a sewing factory in Spanish Fork with other Cambodian women, but it closed shortly after she started. I got the father a job cleaning up a factory each day, later his oldest son did this job. After talking with other refugees, our family decided that they wanted to receive government money to live on. Part of the agreement was Cambodian refugees were to support themselves if the United States allowed them to enter. We could not break this trust. It was dishonest because our family was not unable to work. They said that we were good people, but just not good for them. They left suddenly, and we thought we would never see them again. We gave the trailer back to the person who had financed it for them and felt a little sad.
One day when Dan was nearly two (1986), there was a knock on the door. It was the Cambodian family! They were happy and living in a Cambodian colony in Fillmore Utah. These farm people felt at home in their own culture and growing mushrooms. They gave us a large box of mushrooms as a thank you gift. They came in and visited for a while, admired our new little one, and left. They seemed happy. It was good to see them again and part with good feelings between us. We are glad that we were able to save the lives of these special people. We will always be grateful for all we learned from them.
No comments:
Post a Comment